Sharing a story that I heard over Passover that seems to contain a really important lesson. We were at the Seder, and somebody stood up and seemingly randomly talked about visiting her son in the Israeli army. She said it was a hard trip, and this visit was a bright spot in the whole journey. But when it was over, my son called me, and he said, “Mom, I don’t want to hurt your feelings, but it’s taking me a long time to process all the anxiety that you laid on me.” She continued her story. She said, “What are you talking about?” Her son replied, “When you came to visit me, I was fine, even though I’m obviously in a hard circumstance and I’m fighting in the army, and it’s scary. I’m fine. But then you came in with all your anxiety, and you laid it on me. And you gave me something I didn’t have before. And it wasn’t good.” The woman stopped and turned to the crowd, saying, “Our kids want us to know that they’re fine. They don’t need us adding our personal worries to their plate.” It really got me thinking about how much of the advice I give comes from my own anxiety and how much is genuinely what the other person needs. Food for thought.
By Dr. Dannielle Blumenthal. Opinions my own.
Writing by Dr. Dannielle Blumenthal 